You mentioned:
"for a guy it is very hard to let it go, He interfered with my life and left it in pieces, it is like a mother protecting her young."
This guy made no committment towards you. It's your wife towards whom you should be directing all your frustration. Yes, it's all her doing. All her.
Just leave her and be done with it peacefully. Cheating is uncalled for, no matter what.
DY - Cheaters are despicable individuals!